Banned From Flying: My Son's Favorite Lunch

On Monday I will publish an article about how to travel with a child who has severe allergies. If you (like me) have children without allergies, you'll probably think "don't care" and skip right past it. And that's fine, because you don't need to think about the logistics of traveling with a child who could go into shock from sitting next to someone who eats the wrong thing. But I want to share with you why I think this is important, and why I care, and why I will took the time and energy to write these articles. Most importantly, I want you to understand why you should care too.

Back when I first started this website, I recommended that parents pack peanut butter sandwiches for travel days. I packed them myself. PB&J is easy, it doesn't need refrigeration, it tastes good, and it is a great way to get some protein.

And then one day, a reader politely and gently told me it wasn't a great idea. She shared that "people with allergies can react from the smell or particles in the air or on the seats." I realized she was right, and I updated the text of the article, but secretly I thought "I'm still going to do it" and I had a thousand reasons: "I'm busy," "My son is a picky eater, and this is his favorite lunch" "The chances of sitting near someone with an allergy are small."

The next time we headed out of town, I started to pack him PB&J, and then a funny thing happened... I felt guilty and I packed something else. And in my guilt, I started to be more aware of this issue, and started to be more open to messages in the media about severe allergies. Gradually I learned things like:

  • The incidence of food allergy has doubled in the U.S. over the last 10 years and scientists don't know why.
  • Peanut allergy doubled in children over a five-year period (1997-2002).
  • The incidence of food allergy is highest in young children – one in 17 among those under age 3.
  • About 3 million children in the U.S. have food allergies.
  • Even trace amounts of a food allergen can cause a reaction.
  • A recent analysis of data from U.S. hospital emergency departments (ED) estimated a total of 20,821 hospital ED visits, 2,333 visits for anaphylaxis, and 520 hospitalizations caused by food allergy in just a 2 month period.
  • Death can be sudden, sometimes occurring within minutes.
SOURCE: The Food Allergy & Anaphylaxis Network

Bit by bit, I started to notice more news stories and blog entries about parents who travel with kids who have severe allergies. As DeliciousBaby grew, I started getting periodic tips or questions from parents of allergic children struggling to make their own family trips work. Bit-by-bit the issue became real to me.

Finally, a few weeks ago I started looking for good resources I could link to. I didn't find anything that felt "complete." I asked around, and nobody could point me to one an a resource as detailed as, for example, my recent posts on Breastfeeding on a Plane. I realized that it would be a service to my readers to write more about traveling with severe allergies. I sent out a query, and the stories I got back were nothing short of inspiring, and some of them even brought tears to my eyes.

Finally, I'm beginning to put myself in the shoes of a parent with a child who has a life threatening allergy. I realize that every fiber in my body would tell me to keep my child locked up safely at home. I would want to feed her food I made at home made from produce I grew in my own garden and flour I milled myself. And I'm guessing the parents that I heard from feel that too... but they know that doing that would be wrong for their child, wrong for their families, and wrong for themselves. So they put their kids in school where some well meaning parent might send peanut butter cookies as a snack one day, and they fly across the country or across the world.

They travel not just to visit family, but also to explore new places and cultures, and to have family time, and for all the other reasons that our family travels.

The stories I heard ranged the full gamut of experience. I heard from parents who had nerve racking trips made more difficult by well intentioned strangers who offered their child food when they weren't looking. I heard from parents who had amazing experiences in places as far reaching as France, Spain, Vietnam, and Morocco. Parents told me how they make it all work, from wiping down every surface on the airplane seat, to shipping food ahead, to interviewing local bakers in a foreign language, to renting apartments where they can cook each meal themselves.

And each of them seemed to feel that the experiences they had made the strain and worry worthwhile. In every email message there was an amazing spirit of willingness to make it all work. Why do they do it? Just for a vacation? To check some things off on a list of monuments? I think it's something deeper, I think these parents are giving their kids THE WORLD.

And what they need from the rest of us is simple in comparison. It's nothing really. Don't pack a bag of nuts or a pb&j in your carryon, don't offer a child a snack without asking the parent first, and the next time you see a parent trying to set up a nut-free zone around their child on an airplane, say "come sit next to me." Because really, if we can't help keep each other's children safe, then who will help keep our children safe?

Related Links
Tips and Advice for Traveling With Severe Allergies

Save to del.icio.us | | Posted on June 20, 2008 | 13 comments

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Comments

  1. Believer in Balance

    June 20, 2008 at 8:23 a.m.

    I too used to think food allergies didn't affect me, until a few months ago when my third child was diagnosed with a peanut allergy. The fact that my baby has a life threatening allergy is still tough, but we immediately took steps to make sure she was safe at home. The scary part is not only when we're traveling, but also on our daily outings. Just this month, I had two scares in the same week! One was at school concert when another toddler put an animal cracker in my toddler's mouth. I immediately ran over and scooped it out. The other mom said, "Oh, it's just an animal cracker." I check the ingredients label and it was cross contaminated with peanuts. Two days later I drop her off at the childcare room at the YMCA where there are large posters prohibiting any food in the room due to severe food allergies, and doesn't my daughter pick up a peanut that dropped out of another child's pocket. The childcare provider didn't know if my daughter had eaten one or just found one. It took me hours to stop shaking, I was so freaked. So anyway, I really appreciate you shedding light on how food allergies affect us all, even if we don't have a child with one. Thank you!

  2. minnemom

    June 20, 2008 at 8:25 a.m.

    Debbie, thank you for this article. It brings tears to my eyes to see non-allergy parents being so caring in helping keep our children safe.

    My son is allergic to peanuts, and as you know, that doesn't keep us home. It does, however, require a little more on every journey. A little more thought into where and what we'll eat, a little more attention paid to where the nearest hospital is in case of a reaction, a little more care taken to keep the epi-pens within reach at all times and at the proper temperature, and a little more hope that our outing will be a safe one for our child.

    The kindness of strangers (and friends and family) definitely helps in the journey.

    Thank you for writing about this.

  3. kidsfoodallergiesblog.com

    June 20, 2008 at 12:12 p.m.

    You have me crying too. I very much hope that the next time we fly, we are sitting next to you -- or to someone who has read your post. I am so thankful and appreciative when I encounter parents who have not lived through allergic reactions who are sympathetic to what we are going through. This type of understanding allows me to breathe easier as I try to allow my daughter to live as normal a life as possible -- going on vacation, playing at the park, going to school and camp. Thank you.

  4. Aimee

    June 20, 2008 at 12:39 p.m.

    Thank you!! Thank you for your compassion and understnding. I am very touched. I have 2 children with multiple severe allergies. It is rare to find a non allergy mom who is so considerate of the needs of other kids. I wish more people were like you.

  5. Maria

    June 21, 2008 at 6:42 a.m.

    I found you through Google Alerts and this is much, much appreciated!!! You have a new fan in me! www.allergylifeinloudoun.blogspot.com

  6. Claire

    June 26, 2008 at 9:46 a.m.

    I appreciate your concern about food allergies and agree; I never knew about this.

    On the same wavelength, I am annoyed that airlines allow pets to be brought on board airplanes even though there very often times are people on board with severe allergies to cats & dogs.

  7. Chrystal

    July 3, 2008 at 3:08 p.m.

    My son also has food and environmental allergies, although not to peanuts. A peanut butter sandwich (on gluten and yeast-free bread) is one of the few "take-along" items he is able to eat, and I admit that the "peanut-free craze" has irritated me to no end. Where do we draw the line? Do I have the right to ask that anyone he may come in contact with not eat dairy, wheat, soy, or yeast? When boarding a plane, do I have the right to insist that he not be seated anywhere near someone who has a cat at home for fear the dander on their clothing will cause him to swell up like a balloon? Should I ban him from visiting the homes of friends who have flowers, trees, and grass in their yards? No, I don't believe I do. We will continue to manage his allergies, the way we have been doing. By avoiding what we can and treating him for what we can't.

    There is such a small percentage of the population that actually has a documented airborn allergy to peanuts that I think it's ridiculous to ban such a healthy food.

  8. Janet

    July 17, 2008 at 1:21 p.m.

    Thanks for your support!

  9. alison

    July 20, 2008 at 4:19 p.m.

    Debbie,
    It was great meeting you at BlogHer and I want to thank you for writing this post!

    I would love to know if the previous commenter's son is deathly allergic to dairy, wheat, soy and yeast. My kids also eat no dairy, wheat or soy, in addition to other food allergies (for which we carry an epi-pen). As for peanuts being such a healthy food... um, people are just asking that you not give it to your kid on an airplane, where there is little emergency treatment available if something were to happen. You can't skip just one meal of the pb sandwich? Give him just jelly that day. Or Sunbutter. Or whatever. It's not that hard.

    Sorry about the rant, but it's disturbing to see a mom of a child with food allergies not supporting other mothers of children with food allergies. I don't get it. We are all in this together.

    So, again, thanks Debbie for supporting us!
    Alison @ www.surefoodsliving.com

  10. Debbie

    July 20, 2008 at 4:27 p.m.

    Thanks Alison, it was great meeting you too!

    I personally don't think it's a big deal to give up peanut butter sandwiches on a plane (or in my son's school). Sure, peanut butter is easy and well liked, but there are lots of other options

    IMO, if the parents say that the child has a severe airborne allergy, then the people around them should either not expose the child to the allergen or move further away. I don't think anybody is asking that nobody ever eat peanuts on a plane, but I find it easier not to pack them knowing that they could make another child sick.

    Furthermore, if it were my child, I would want to minimize the number of times we had to administer an epi-pen (let alone the risk of having an allergic reaction on, for example a transatlantic flight).

    Debbie

  11. jodi

    August 9, 2008 at 11:39 a.m.

    Thanks so much for your understanding and support. I simply cannot believe Chrystal has any first hand knowledge of food allergies. I have a 12 year old peanut allergic child and we have never experienced the lack of human kindness that her comments reflect. Instead we have had wonderful support from strangers....a woman once even gave me a package of wipes from her diaper bag before a flight so I could wipe down the area (I had forgotten mine). My son's safety often depends on others, and people have rarely let us down. I am thankful for your helpful article. You have helped a great many people with it!
    Jodi

  12. Lauren

    August 26, 2008 at 2:55 p.m.

    Thank you so much for this article. I have a daughter with severe peanut allergy, and I am very nervous about her starting preschool. This was such a nice piece about how you can help a very growing population of people with a dangerous allergy. It's true that it's relatively rare, and it's true that it can be a real incovenience for kids (and adults) to forgo nuts, especially if they have limited protein sources. But on an airplane it truly could save someone's life. One thing non-allergic persons might not know is that allergy sufferers cannot predict the severity of their next reaction. A reaction might be hives time after time, then progress to anaphylaxis or worse without warning.

  13. Marlen

    September 21, 2008 at 9:28 p.m.

    My son thanks you...

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